Tag Archives: happy

Did I stick to my 2018 Goals?

Often times I find that we make these new years resolutions and we never actually revisit them after January. I wanted to look at what I wrote down as my New Years resolution for 2018 and see if I was able to stick with some of what I wrote down. This is not only a means of holding myself accountable but also a means of encouraging myself to stick on the path that I am on and work harder at things that I wrote down. So without further ado, lets get into it!

  1. No more self silencing – This was something that was directed towards one person in my life who use to make me feel really bad about expressing myself. He was constantly criticizing me and making it seem as though everything that came out of my mouth was WRONG or STUPID (which was really funny because he literally was a person that had not one pot to piss in). This is what caused me to self silence as a means to not offend this person. I never had this issue with anyone else. Long story short, it was HIM not ME, and my life has been way better ever since we have broken ties. So I do not self silence and I guess I technically never really did.
  2. No More Comparing – Sadly, this again ties into #1. This person made me feel so crappy about myself that I was CONSTANTLY comparing myself to other women. I got rid of his negativity and began comparing myself WAY LESS.
  3. Self Preservation – I think that this year I have done a better job of self preservation but I definitely can do better. One great thing that happened to me in the last quarter of the year was that I began drinking way less and started being a little bit more conscience and aware of what I was putting in my body. I also tried to be aware of what I was watching and listening to, because as you may or may not know, all of that can really have an affect on your everyday life.  I also began going to church on a weekly basis and utilized the word as a means of mental renewal.
  4. Using Social Media Less – I think that I had spurts of when I was using it less, but definitely not where I want to be. If you know anything, then you should know that social media is a tool that can really kill ones spirit.
  5. No complaining, Positive Outlooks Only – I have gotten way better at this! I try to be more aware of what I am saying and how I am thinking in general. This has allowed me to be less depressed and really push through the hard times.
  6. Be more prepared – Last year I wrote this because school was a real struggle for me and I felt as though I was lacking, but in reality I am not this ill prepared person.
  7. Work Harder – This is something that everyone can try to better at year over year. Work harder than your hardest! I did do that this past year, and I plan on doing it again in 2019!
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Getting my spirit right – How to make the first steps to change your life

I am realizing now that for the last few years my spirit has been all wrong. If you asked my then though, I would have said it was in the right place.

As hard as it is to admit, this time last year I was arrogant (because I was entering an MBA program), I was scared (because I was entering an MBA program), I was jealous (I was always comparing others lives to mine), I was mean (using my power to hurt others if I felt like I was wronged), I was depressed ( I was in a toxic relationship with a person who was lost too), and I was constantly filled with anxiety (I always consumed myself with thoughts of the future and what was going to happen to me). I thought I was a good person but in reality I was lost and bound to the person society said I should be (looking at the way black women are portrayed in the media, I was fitting in very well with that mold). It took me some time and some bad incidences to realize that something in my life had to change. I could no longer keep waking up with a deep aching feeling inside of my chest and having the occasional cry in my car just to “let things out”. I needed more, a lot more. And that is when I decided that I was going to push myself and seek out God.

Now that I am on a spiritual journey and rediscovering Christ I realized that I had to turn away from A LOT. In order to do so I had to sit and really think about the things I needed to eliminate in order to get to where I’m was trying to be. Below are a few things I’ve changed:

1. Decreasing my time spent on social media – this is a hard one but a necessary one. I haven’t given it up cold turkey but I did delete my Instagram app. I was spending hours looking at what everyone else was doing in their lives and would begin feeling depression or envy. In order to combat this I deleted my app to decrease my accessibility to those thoughts and feelings.

2. Reading my Bible, watching sermons – it’s amazing how the things we go through today are written about in the Bible. God has provided us with the blueprint to properly navigate through our lives, all we have to do is read what’s in his word.

3. Forcing myself to think positively– I was told that if you force yourself to think positively, it trains your brain, over time, to think positively. This is important in combating negative feelings that may be weighing you down. I have really made a point to do this daily and I have already been feeling a massive difference

4. Talking to someone – whether it be a counselor, a therapist, a pastor or a life coach, talking to a professional on the regular will help with trying to change your life. And no I’m not talking about your best friend who is probably just as lost, hurt and broken as you, but a real professional who knows what they are talking about and who can give you techniques to strive and get better.

5. Changing what I eat – believe it or not what you eat actually affects your mood and behavior. You eat junk, you’re going to get junk. Changing up my diet is still something I’m working on but I have decreased the amount of junk foods in my diet. Though it’s hard being a college student and not eating out, this is essential in turning things around.

I have a lot more tips that I will save for another post but these are just a few that I have started with to help me down the right path. So far, just a few weeks in to my journey and with these changes I have already been able to FEEL a really big change!