Tag Archives: joy

2019, Im coming for you

I am a week into 2019 and I have to say that Im really excited for what is to come for me. Something happened on Jan 1, 2019 that I have never experienced before. I was filled with excitement, and optimism. Yes, theres a lot of things that I need to get done this year, and NO everything is not currently perfect but I am really content with where I am at mentally. 2018 was not easy or perfect but for the first time in a long time I can literally see the changes that have occurred within myself and the benefits that I have received from it. In all, I am just really proud of myself for my PUSH THROUGH game, and I am content with the path that I am on. Many people love to brag about all their physical successes, but for me 2018 was about spiritual, emotional, and mental successes. It was about getting myself right and pushing forward. Although I still have a lot to do (find a job, finish school, make other big life decisions) I know that God is walking with me every step of the way and I know that I don’t need to worry about anything. I am claiming it. This will be my year, and every year after this!

Advertisements

I turned the big 3-0

I remember when I turned 25, I was so sad. I cried and cried thinking that I was getting so old, I was unmarried and I was super miserable in the relationship I was in.

Each year that passed after that, the feeling somewhat stayed the same. A feeling of “oh Gosh, I’m getting older, what do I do now”.

But as my 30th drew near, something clicked in me and the usual feeling of sadness did not come. Rather, As my birthday approached I was filled with excitement and appreciation to see this age. The last few months I have been on an appreciation kick. Appreciating every last thing I could think of from big things such as being in an MBA program, to small things like being able to move all my toes and fingers. This appreciation didn’t allow me to feel any sense of sadness or anxiety of being 30, rather I was filled with joy that God allowed me to be on this earth this long.

I must say, I love the thought of being in my 30s and leaving all the junk and baggage of my 20s behind. I am now older, calmer, smarter, stronger….better. And that my friends is something worth being happy for!

You can lead a horse to water

I am a helper. If you are in my life and I rock with you, I’m going to do all I can to help you. I believe helping others is especially important for those in the black community because if we don’t do it, who will?

But what happens when you continue to help someone and they continue to mess up the opportunities that you have opened for them? This is a place in which I am right now.

I struggle letting people go and just faltering, especially when I know what they can do to turn things around. But when I overextend myself only to have them mess up again it can be an extremely disappointing, frustrating, and distressing to me.

You know that old saying, “you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him drink”,that’s the exact sentiment that I feel. For this person I have literally given a massive amount to fully transform their life and yet they still found a way to completely mess it up. What do I do now as this person opens up to me about their troubles? Let them fall extremely hard this time or do what I’ve been doing the last few years and help…AGAIN?

In a way to ensure that I don’t put myself in a bad space I have decided to try to help this person one last time and take a massively different approach. Take on a less hands on and more of a coaching approach. I am not here to physically do things for this person anymore, I am here to guide them and offer advice when they ask. I am here to give them literature and passages that will help them head in the right direction. It is now up to them to choose to stay on the path of always ruining things, or finally deciding to be responsible. I can no longer utilize my contacts and my personal resources to help. All I can do now is watch and pray for them and offer kind words to keep them encouraged. Although my first instinct was to do what I always do and overextend myself to help, this time I will just sit back and allow them to figure things out for themself. Hopefully this new strategy works.

-With Love Kim-

Chicago

I just wanted to post some pictures of Chicago that I’ve taken this far. And yes all photo creds go to me lol!

This city is so beautifully constructed it’s somewhat magical!

I took these first three photos from my balcony. I am still at awe that I get to wake up and go to sleep to this every day!

Located right outside of our downtown office, I took this on a lunch break and realized for the first time how beautiful the Chicago river was.

Another photo right outside my office building. The architecture here is insane

Right outside where I live but from a different vantage point.

I began to walk and looked up. Never thought a train line could be so beautiful.

From the sears tower! 1400 feet off the ground!

New Obsession: Stock Trading

I was recently asked by someone to download a stock trading app so that person could get free stock sent to them. Sure, why not? If all I’m doing is downloading an app there is no harm in that.

Little did I know that one app was about to open me up to a whole new world. I am currently now obsessed with trading stocks and I’ve spent the last 48 hours researching companies, reading reports and buying stock. This is my new thing now and I have promised myself to purchase at least $50 worth of stock each pay check.

I get that $50 doesn’t seem like a lot but man will it be worth it in the long run! What is great is that because I’ve learned about a few things in business school I am able to make more informed decisions. Don’t get me wrong, I am not about to be an analyst or trader but I do understand the jargon in reports enough for me to make somewhat decent decisions.

I am so glad I found this app! For many years I had been saying that I wanted to trade stocks outside of the company stocks that I owned.

As I’ve become extremely strategic and serious about building my wealth, this app has come at a perfect time for me! My goal is to own 100 shares of different stocks by the end of the year (hey ya gotta start small). I encourage all young women to begin doing this! It’s a really great way to build for your future and it is somewhat fun too! And with all of the different apps made available it is really easy and simple to do! The app that I am currently using is called Robinhood and so far it has been a really great app that I suggest others to look into.

I am so excited that I’ve finally done this and I can’t wait to see what my stocks do!

Living in Chicago

I moved to Chicago May 27, and I have been adjusting to the dynamics of this new city.

I moved here knowing one person, and not really knowing much about Chicago outside of what Ive seen in the news. But nonetheless I was excited about this new adventure and how I would adjust.

The last time I moved to a new city where I only knew one person, I was miserable. Mostly due to the space I was in during that time period. I was 24, and in a bad space. Like many in their early 20s my focus was all wrong and I never looked at things from a positive lenses.

I knew that my move to Chicago wouldn’t be the same for several reasons, but mostly because of my mentality, maturity, and tenacity. I have also become very content being alone, watching Netflix’s, reading and praying. Because I’ve found this inner peace and happiness. I knew moving to Chicago would be a breeze.

I am six weeks in and I have to say this city has grown on me. I currently live on the North side of the city in the most affluent area of Chicago. Not knowing anything about Chicago I had no idea of the socioeconomic status of my current place of residency. Everything was mostly based off of convenience and access to my specific housing requirements. The view from my apartment is amazing and I can see the lake and the Sears Tower. Every Wednesday and Saturday there are fireworks from the lake, which is a nice little bonus. Everything in my neighborhood is clean, safe and within walking distance.

View of the Sears Tower from my bed

View from my balcony

I have also developed a small friends circle with people who are also MBA interns living in Chicago for the summer. This actually surprised me the most as I historically have shied away from making bonds with new people due to my anxieties and trust issues.

I have six more weeks left here and I intend to really enjoy every moment of it. I am so GRATEFUL to God allowing me this opportunity to move to a new city by myself and really push myself to flourish!

Getting my spirit right – How to make the first steps to change your life

I am realizing now that for the last few years my spirit has been all wrong. If you asked my then though, I would have said it was in the right place.

As hard as it is to admit, this time last year I was arrogant (because I was entering an MBA program), I was scared (because I was entering an MBA program), I was jealous (I was always comparing others lives to mine), I was mean (using my power to hurt others if I felt like I was wronged), I was depressed ( I was in a toxic relationship with a person who was lost too), and I was constantly filled with anxiety (I always consumed myself with thoughts of the future and what was going to happen to me). I thought I was a good person but in reality I was lost and bound to the person society said I should be (looking at the way black women are portrayed in the media, I was fitting in very well with that mold). It took me some time and some bad incidences to realize that something in my life had to change. I could no longer keep waking up with a deep aching feeling inside of my chest and having the occasional cry in my car just to “let things out”. I needed more, a lot more. And that is when I decided that I was going to push myself and seek out God.

Now that I am on a spiritual journey and rediscovering Christ I realized that I had to turn away from A LOT. In order to do so I had to sit and really think about the things I needed to eliminate in order to get to where I’m was trying to be. Below are a few things I’ve changed:

1. Decreasing my time spent on social media – this is a hard one but a necessary one. I haven’t given it up cold turkey but I did delete my Instagram app. I was spending hours looking at what everyone else was doing in their lives and would begin feeling depression or envy. In order to combat this I deleted my app to decrease my accessibility to those thoughts and feelings.

2. Reading my Bible, watching sermons – it’s amazing how the things we go through today are written about in the Bible. God has provided us with the blueprint to properly navigate through our lives, all we have to do is read what’s in his word.

3. Forcing myself to think positively– I was told that if you force yourself to think positively, it trains your brain, over time, to think positively. This is important in combating negative feelings that may be weighing you down. I have really made a point to do this daily and I have already been feeling a massive difference

4. Talking to someone – whether it be a counselor, a therapist, a pastor or a life coach, talking to a professional on the regular will help with trying to change your life. And no I’m not talking about your best friend who is probably just as lost, hurt and broken as you, but a real professional who knows what they are talking about and who can give you techniques to strive and get better.

5. Changing what I eat – believe it or not what you eat actually affects your mood and behavior. You eat junk, you’re going to get junk. Changing up my diet is still something I’m working on but I have decreased the amount of junk foods in my diet. Though it’s hard being a college student and not eating out, this is essential in turning things around.

I have a lot more tips that I will save for another post but these are just a few that I have started with to help me down the right path. So far, just a few weeks in to my journey and with these changes I have already been able to FEEL a really big change!