Tag Archives: trinidad and tobago

5 Things you can do Today to Kick Depression 😁

Listen, I use to hate when I was depressed and people would say to me “Happiness is a Choice”…but lowkey ….it is.

If you were like me, you’re probably rolling your eyes right now. What that expression is saying is that you have the power to make specific steps to become happier. I didn’t know this before but I recently discovered that the following 5 steps can really help in making you happier.

1) Get off social media

Bruh, I’m trying to tell you. Nothing makes you more depressed than looking at others happy, living their best lives and doing things you aren’t doing. Remember, nobody posts their struggles and social media is just a highlight reel. It’s a fake metric to life and it will only make you more depressed. So take a break and get your mind right.

2) Write down your blessings each day

Thinking about what I do have, and all the blessings in my life has done tremendous for my mental health. What do I mean? Well think about it, being alive is a blessing. Having sight, all your limbs, having another day to make things better in your life are all blessings. When I started to really think about what I do have and how things could be so much worse, it really helped me to stop feeling so depressed and to be more grateful.

3) Make a plan to get out of your depression

There are several reasons why you could be depressed. Money issues, relationship issues, work, school…life is hard man, I get it. But, what steps can you take to make things better? If you just broke up with your boyfriend and you want to stop being sad, write down what you will do to get better each day. Will you join a work out class? Become more involved in church? Whatever it is, make that plan. Have specific steps and check them off. Having a plan makes the world seem less big and your mind less frantic!

4) Spend a certain amount of time alone

This one is something that I wish I knew before. People would always say “you’re depressed, go out and have fun.” Uhhhh sure but my fun would usually land me drinking tequila shots with my friends and me internally still feeling low. It wasn’t until I was by myself, going through the motions with my thoughts that I was able to properly create coping mechanism for my depression. Trust me, this wasn’t easy at all but it was necessary for me to sit with my thoughts, confront them, then combat them.

5) Stay away from drugs and alcohol

This was probably one of the most crucial things for me. As hard as it is to say it, I may have drank too much in my day. Any time I was stressed, sad, mad,happy, anxious …anything, I would drink alcohol. But guess what…the next day the problems were still there and I would feel even more guilty about wasting my time drinking rather than trying to come up with solutions. This would then make me even more depressed. And then the depression cycle would continue.

These steps aren’t a overnight thing. You need to keep at it and work on it each day in order to get your mind right. It’s not going to be easy but starting with these steps will for sure help you down the path of a depression-less life!

-Kim C

Being Still

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I have been away for a long time…

So, where have I been?

To put it quite frankly I have been away…BEING STILL. Yes, You read that right, The last few months I took time out to do the least, be still, focus on myself, and reevaluate many things in my life. In doing this I found the greatest gift of all…I found God.

Finding God honestly wasn’t my goal. I took time to be still because my life was not going the way that I wanted it to. I had, had and extremely stressful second year of my MBA program, and I had decided to separate myself, be by myself, and just be still with my thoughts. I will admit, when I first decided to do this it was 100% due to my depression. I didn’t have an awe inspiring moment of retrospective where I knew this is what I HAD TO DO to better myself. No, I just didn’t want to be around happy people because I felt so crappy. I was having a hard time finding a job that I wanted, and as I saw all of my friends landing their dream jobs. I was left feeling like God had forgotten me. I didn’t want to be around them as they were happy, and joyous. As they knew of their future plans and were making arrangements for their new lives, I was left wondering “Whats going to happen to me”. I just didn’t want to be around the swirling questions of “So, what are you doing next year?”, and me having to admit that I hadn’t achieved the goal that we were all in B-School for. This avoidance led to me wanting to be alone. Alone with myself, and thoughts.  I stopped going out with my friends, and even skipped graduation because I didn’t want to be bothered to be around people. I only really spent time with my boyfriend and my roommate. Other than that, I was withdrawn. I would drink and smoke to cope only to wake up the next day feeling even more depressed.

In the midst of this depression, I saw an IG post for a church about 20 mins away from my apartment. A girl who I use to be best friends with in high school had posted it. I then went to the churches IG page and began watching its content. I was immediately drawn to the messages, and I knew that I had to go visit this church for myself. I had been attending another popular church in my area, but I was only attending to check that box of ✔️Im going to church✔️Im a good Christian…so now God will bless me.  It didn’t better me, nor did I have a desire to change my life M-Sa. But this new church….it just felt different.

Im not going to lie, it wasn’t just an overnight thing. I didn’t walk in the doors of the church and my life just magically changed. I had to really lean in, and keep attending. This new church kept me coming back because it intrigued me, it made me want to read the Bible for myself and learn more. I still was battling with depression but going to church and learning about God and chasing after him slowly began to change my mindset. I stopped drinking and smoking. I was more conscientious of the media that I consumed. As I said, it wasn’t an overnight thing and there were times when I sat there and was like “What is all this for. Is God even real?” But when I would feel this way, I would give myself a few days of frustration and then come back push in even more to build a relationship with Him. I would pray harder, I would read my Bible more, and I would watch more sermons to get my spirit right. I even became heavily involved in my church to distract myself from my own thoughts.

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Me in Trinidad February 2019

Today I am able to honestly report that I am in such a GREAT SPACE. As, I said before this was not an overnight thing, and it took me some time to get to this space. If I had given up and quit with this journey I wouldn’t be where I am today. Mentally, and Emotionally, I am in such an AUTHENTIC happy space (authenticity is key). I attribute all of this due to me being STILL. The old me would have pushed more into partying, drinking and smoking to attempt to cope with the disappointments in my life but this time around I decided to do things differently. And with me doing so, I also found God. The best gift of my life.

I share this story to encourage you to not avoid your problems, not to drown yourselves in coping methods but to rather take time to be STILL. A Lot of time. Not just a week or a weekend. It might take months, but keep still until the atmosphere changes. Keep still and find enriching things to fill your time. Keep still and find God.

 

XoXo -Kim

 

MBA Chronicles: Power of THE PUSH

 

I am two weeks away from business school orientation and I feel like I have a million and one things to get done. My to do list comprises of finishing up pre-course work, back to school shopping, getting my immunization records to the school, deferring my loans, buying stuff for my new apartment, registering for “Math Camp”, doing work for the career services team, and so much more.

The pre-course workload is way heavier than I thought it would be and I’m starting to regret going on vacation and doing nothing for two weeks. Usually in situations like these I would get 1) super flustered  2) just quit and say I’m not doing it and just take the 0% grade. But it’s crazy when you want something bad enough you will somehow find your inner grit, and get sh*t done. Yesterday I had a very late start to my day (my sleep pattern is way off ever since returning from vacation). I went to the library around 5pm and started doing work. I went home right before the library closed at 9pm, and kept doing work. Before I knew it, it was 2:30am! Between the hours of 5pm-2:30am I dedicated my time to my school work. Was I tired? Hell yes, but what kept me motivated was my end goal of making six figures after I graduate, and how badly I want to reach that goal.

In undergrad I wasn’t the best student, but I wasn’t the worst. When I applied myself I made Deans List 4 out of the 8 semesters I was there. I slept a lot in undergrad and hardly ever stayed up past 12am studying. If something was hard I’d bullsh*t my way through it to get a decent enough grade. Back then I was too lazy to see the importance of hard work. Fast forward to today, Ive had a 9-5 job in corporate America that I hated. I have been underpaid for most of my career and the work that I was doing was not interesting to me at all. Going through that experience really has given me the ” The Power of the Push”. 

I’m not sure where I got this term from, maybe I made it up…but this is a term that has been repeating in my head over and over again since I’ve been in this season. “The Power of the Push” is what separates great from mediocre, the strong from the weak, and those who want it to those who don’t.

For most of my life I have always felt as though there are just some people who just succeed because they are simply smarter. As I navigated through corporate America, I realized that its not about smarts all the time. Its about who works harder, who wants it more, who pushes harder to get what they want. I mean a great example of this is Donald Trump. His vocabulary is limited, he isn’t well read, and he isn’t the smartest cookie in the batch but some how he has been able to elevate himself to the highest office in the United States (granted him being a white man has probably helped a lot too, lol).

My will to succeed is so strong that I can not see anything except GREAT things ahead of me. I am willing to put my blood, sweat, and tears into this. Something that I can’t say Ive been willing to do for anything in my life thus far. So as I begin my business school career I am going to promise myself to keep pushing, to not allow outside factors disrupt my grind, and to always remember the POWER of the PUSH!!!

Fort King George



The final place that we visited while in Tobago was Fort King George. Fort King George was built in the 1780s. The country has done a great job of preserving this site and here you can still find old cannons, a prison, barracks and a bell tank. Although this tourist site has many historical artifacts that are present the thing that had us most at awe were the views. We were lucky enough to go to the fort right as the sun was setting and this was the best thing that I had ever been a witness to. Seeing the sun set and looking down at the whole island really made me realize how truly blessed I am to see some of the sights that I was able to see on that trip.

Argyle Waterfall 

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Our last full day we were in Tobago we ventured out to Argyle Waterfall. Argyle Waterfall is about an hour away from where we were staying. As we drove to the waterfall we passed some of the most beautiful views that I’ve ever seen in my life. Driving along the coast for about 60% of the trip my boyfriend and I were wowed by the beauty we witnessed.

Once we reached the attraction we had to pay about $60TT dollars to be admitted into the attraction. From the entrance to the main waterfall it takes about 15 minutes or less to walk. As you get closer and closer to the waterfall it become more difficult to walk as you have to walk up and down slippery rocks and moist leaves to get to the waterfall.

my cousin walking to the waterfall
walking along the trail to the waterfall
my sister and I pictured with bamboo

The first and main waterfall isn’t all that there is to it. Once you arrive to this point there’s an option to climb the waterfall and go up to the several other levels, pools and waterfalls that are higher up on the mountain. Being that I was not confident enough with my mountain climbing skills I elected to stay at the bottom as my cousins and boyfriend made their way to the top.

As my boyfriend began climbing, one of my cousins kicked off his shoes and told him that climbing the waterfall would be easier without shoes. Apparently if you have “American Feet” and you are not used to walking around outside barefooted this is not the right move. My boyfriend climbed the whole waterfall barefooted and in pain. This made for many laughs after the fact but he learned his lesson.

My boyfriend and cousin climbing the trail to get to the top of the waterfall
My cousins and boyfriend at the top of the first waterfall

Maracas Bay Beach

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*Maracas Bay lookout

Although we didn’t get the chance to do or see a lot of things that I would I have wanted my boyfriend to experience, we did get the chance to go to one of my favorite places in Trinidad and that is Maracas Bay. People have their critique about Maracas and I know many people in my family are probably tired of it but for some reason no matter how many times I come to Trinidad I always try to go to Maracas. I am always told that there are way better beaches in Trinidad but for some reason this is the place I love the most. When I am there I am flooded with so many memories of grandparents, and my youth.

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*view of Port of Spain

The views driving to Maracas beach are amazing. We were able to stop and take some pictures at a “lookout”  of Port of Spain (the capital city). I can’t recall ever stopping there in any of my visits to Trinidad, so seeing the whole city in that manner was a true treat for me. After leaving the lookout we proceeded to Maracas bay where we were able to stop at another lookout before getting to the actual beach. The views of Maracas are breathtaking, but one thing that Maracas is known for is bake and shark. Bake and shark consists of a piece of bread like substance that is fried and a piece of fried shark. After getting the bake and shark you would then dress it with a number of different sauces and veggies. Bake and shark shacks are all over Maracas beach, but the most famous shack is one that was featured on Andrew Zimmerman’s Food Network show Bizarre Foods. This shack is called Richards Bake and Shark. We were in a very large group (as some people in our group had never been to Trinidad) so we made it a point to go to this shack. As I had mentioned before I have not been to Trinidad in five years so making sure that I go to as many places as I could was important to me but going to Richards was quite disappointing. I’m guessing since they have gotten some notoriety from the tv show they have had to produce at a higher rate daily and this has brought down the quality. Other people in our group really enjoyed it, as it was their first time eating it but I took two bites from my sandwich and was done with it. My boyfriend was completely unimpressed by the bake and shark as well lol. But the trip was still a good trip as we were able to see some extremely beautiful views exclusive to Trinidad.

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*Maracas Beach

We made it

The first four days of our vacation were spent in Trinidad. I had hoped to introduce my boyfriend to a lot of my favorite things that Trinidad has to offer but without a car and without the convenience of car service apps such as Uber, it was extremely hard for me to do that. It saddens me to know that he will leave Trinidad never trying doubles 😦 or ever eating the jelly of a coconut, but I think that he has gotten a slight sense of the culture hanging out with my family. The first four days were filled with family members arriving to Trinidad, lots of food and liming. Very uneventful but still relaxing (at least to me).